Bega couple on 60 years of marriage: 'You should always hold your wife's hand'

In February 2021, the 83-year-old couple celebrated their 60^th anniversary.

They met in the home of a fortune teller named Ms Michelle who lived in Punchbowl, southwest Sydney.

Linda had gone there to have her fortune told and Graeme was there visiting the woman's son.

"I came into have a cup of tea or something and Ms Michelle said to me, 'oh Graeme, you want to be careful,' and I said, 'why is that Ms Michelle?' And she said, 'the woman you're going to marry is in this house."

Graeme said he didn't believe her at the time, but a short time after, his "courtship" of Linda began. They were 19 years old when they first started dating.

It seems it was the motorcycle that really caught Linda's eye.

Although the adults around her weren't too keen on her jumping on the back of Graeme's motorcycle for a ride home, she said, "I didn't mind, it got me around," with a cheeky smile on her face.

Linda was working at White Rose Confectionery as a lolly packer and lived at Bexley at the time.

"Everyone used to know when Graeme was coming, the windows would be down, especially in the summertime and they'd say, 'now Linda be careful!' And I would say, 'he's a good driver!'"

The couple described Linda's accent as "very broad at the time," as she had moved from Scotland in her teens with her parents. Her father had fallen in love with Australia during the war and wanted to come back.

"My mother did it to keep the peace," said Linda, "But I didn't want to come, I said, 'what are we going out to Australia for? All my grannies are still alive?'"

Graeme didn't have an issue understanding her, something that Linda really appreciated - "he could understand me, because a Scotsman brought him up".

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The wedding proposal came two years later and Graeme said he was gripped with shyness and so pulled the ring out and said, "there, what do you think?"

Linda and Graeme's mother had already chosen the ring before the proposal, however Linda's father was not quite so supportive when he asked for her hand in marriage.

"I can remember it clear as if it were yesterday, he said to me, 'you're not bloody good enough for my daughter, you're not a Scotsman, you're a bloody Australian!' He said it in worse words than that too I tell ya.

"I said, 'suit yourself old man,' and that was it," said Graeme.

They were married at St David's Presbyterian Church, Lakemba in 1961.

When Linda purchased her dress with her mother she was disappointed she wouldn't be able to ride on the back of the motorcycle in her wedding dress.

"My mother said, 'you not going on that motorbike in your dress, you can forget it!"

"I like the motorbike, I would have got married on it if I could," said Linda.

Three years later their first and only child Louise was born.

They both remember the birth as quite traumatic as Linda had a difficult birth and Graeme was not allowed in to see his wife or child for three or four days after the birth.

"I cannot remember the first time I saw my daughter, I was that upset," said Graeme. "That's what it was like in those days."

"I hated that," said Linda.

They moved to Bega 30 years ago after Graeme got a job working on Brogo Dam. Apart from living far from their daughter in Forbes, they're very happy in the Bega Valley.

Any challenges throughout their 60 years of marriage were dealt with through "lots of patience, and lots of love," said Graeme.

"We sit down and work things out and that's about all I can say," he said.

One of the biggest challenges they faced was a car accident that left Linda with a brain injury.

"I thought she was dead, and God knows what I would have done if she had been," said Graeme.

Linda had to remain in hospital for six months and Graeme faced a long recovery for a shoulder and arm injury.

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Unfortunately the accident has continued to impact on their lives and Linda's memory and dexterity has never been the same. She has also been suffering with dementia in her older years.

"I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy what we've been through," said Linda.

Graeme does most of the cooking and laundry, something he had to learn since he came from a generation, "who had a wife to do that".

"I've got one in a million, he has to put up with a hell of a lot and it hurts me because I can't cook, I can't lift anything properly, but I do everything else, all the washing up," said Linda.

Graeme's advice to younger couples was, "don't be so blasted selfish, it's a lot of give and take.

"You accept the person that you propose to and you propose for the rest of your life.

"My job was to look after my wife, because that was my family and I can remember standing there in front of that pastor and I made a vow that for better or worse, that was it. I like to think my word means something."

The other vital ingredients Graeme gave were to always practice humour, believe in something whether religious or not, never go to sleep angry at one another, and "kiss your wife every night".

"You should always hold your wife's hand, it doesn't matter where you go," said Graeme matter-of-factly.

"Even just walking down the street, we always hold hands," said Linda smiling.